Cerebral sparks

The Lover after me.

2008-06-24T07:36:00.009+05:00

Here I go again I promised myself I wouldnt think of you today
Its been seven months and counting
Youve moved on
I still feel exactly the same
Its just the that everywhere I go all the buildings know your name
Like photographs and memories of love
Steel and granite reminders
The city calls your name and I cant move on

Ever since youve been gone
The lights go out the same
The only difference is
You call another name
To your love
To your lover now
To your love
The lover after me

Am I all alone in the universe?
Theres no love on these streets
I have given mine away to a world that didnt want it anyway
So this is my new freedom
Its funny
I dont remember being chained
But nothing seems to make sense anymore

Without you Im always twenty minutes late

Ever since youve been gone
The lights go out the same
The only difference is
You call another name
To your love
To your lover now
To your love
The lover after me

And time goes by so slowly
The nights are cold and lonely
I shouldnt be holding on
But Im still holding on for you

Here I go again
I promised myself I wouldnt think of you today
But Im standing at your doorway
Im calling out your name because I cant move on

Ever since youve been gone
The lights go out the same
The only difference is
You call another name
To your love
To your lover now
To your love
The lover after me

Savage Garden - "The Lover after me"

Islamophobia and the oppression of Muslims in the West.

2008-06-18T07:49:00.006+05:00

Islamophobia refers to an irrational fear of Islam. Negative perceptions of Islam can be traced back to the Crusades and through colonialism, but it has gained new ground post 9/11 all over the world. Most islamophobists stereotype Islam as more or less a terrorist religion with various factions all across the world involved in just a single motive, the Jihad. The Jihad itself has been grossly misrepresented in the West; and this has led to increasing marginalization of Muslim communities all across the world.

The Congressional Research Service came out with a report on the difficulties faced by European countries in particular, in integrating Islamic communities and in creating a sense of nationalism amongst them. The report goes on to say how the British, French and Spanish governments have failed miserably in addressing this aspect of immigrant integration. This, along with the lower socio-economic status of many muslims in Europe, has led to an increased exploitation of these masses by fundamentalist islamic terrorists. From the time of 9/11 various Western countries have formed new policies to contain these "homegrown" terrorists and have intensified their dialogue with the moderate elements living in the West. Newly formed laws in legalization of citizenship status, immigration as well as anti-discrimination legislation have led to further marginalization of the muslim factions.

In fact the term Islamophobia becomes irrelevant at this point, for this discrimination is not purely based on religion; but also on race, ethnicity and class. It is also now a state-formed real threat; similar to the massive anti-semitism that was created by Nazi leaders all over Europe during the second world war.

The religious diversity of Islam and the ethnic populations that practise it are subsumed by the policies of the West and is compounded by the lower socio-economic status of muslim immigrants in Europe.

When we look at the various islamic communities across the world, we see a very diverse set of societies in many countries. They differ ethnically and in their religious perception of Islam. All this is usually subsumed when the western governments make policies entirely based on religion. All over Europe the islamic communities usually form the underclass. There is rampant unemployment among these communities; and most of them live in extremely poor conditions usually set apart from the mainstream population.

2. Terrorism is viewed as something that has infiltrated in along with the immigrants. Many Western countries do not accept this as a problem that has been caused by their own failure to reach out to the ethnic muslims in their countries.

With increasing terrorism; many European countries have created stricter immigration laws. What they fail to see is that terrorism is neither foreign nor domestic ; it is as if the internal and external security policies have been conflated with one another. Part of the 9/11 attacks were planned in Europe; in Hamburg. At least twenty people that have been arrested in Guantanamo Bay are Europeans. In France for example, the police was given extra power to stop and search vehicles at will, to search houses without prior notification and also extensive monitoring of electronic equipment. In Germany, religious groups could be legally banned in the interest of maintaining democracy. In England, suspects could be detained indefinitely if they were perceived as "unsuitable" for living in the country. One in eight people arrested as a terrorist suspect was a muslim. Increasing number of muslims were arrested for other kinds of crimes due to the now -increased power enjoyed by the police. These are just a few representative examples of the many European countries that have strengthened anti-immigration laws, making expulsion of foreigners easier.
The worst policies were however exercized by the US government. The PATRIOT Act lessened the restrictions on surveillance, allowed various personal records to be obtained by authorities, reduced the privacy of attorney-client conversation, and broadened the definition of terrorism to include ‘material support,’ a concept which has not been fully defined. Along with these changes in the law, American citizens have been imprisoned without judicial review, mosques have been searched for radiation without warrants, phone calls and phone records have been obtained without court approval, and individuals have been abducted and sent to secret prisons, as well as foreign prisons where they could be interrogated with more violent methods.

Islam is seen as a threat and there is increasing anti-muslim sentiment among the western populations
.Islam is now seen as a threat to the integrity of European countries. There is increasing anti-immigration sentiment among the people. This anti-Muslim sentiment is widely seen not just as an increased physical abuse of muslims, but also abuse through political, media and intellecutal discourse. This discrimination stems from the policies towards ethnic minorities, anti-terrorism policies, and legal changes expressed in immigration and naturalization processes. In Europe rejection of cultural differences has thus become more common and more public.
Islamists are also seen as terrorists in Europe. There is an increasing suspicion of Muslims to be rooted in radical islam; but out of the 358 terrorists arrested in France, only 94 are muslim; the rest are Basque separatists. In the UK, all search laws as well as anti-terrorism laws were disproportionately used against people from South Asian decent.
In the immigration policies, many European countries have a naturalization test that immigrants must take. This has increasingly become anti-Islamic. Islamic women living in France are banned from wearing the burqa in public and they must accept treatment from male doctors too. Netherlands and Germany show increasingly sexual pictures of nudists and expect the immigrants to be completely OK with sexuality, and other kinds of sexual orientations. It is increasingly clear that most of these tests create a bridge between the immigrant and the mainstream by showing extreme differences in their respective cultures. Muslim immigrants also face increasing difficulties in obtaining residence permits, visas and nationalization.

There’s been an increase in the physical and verbal abuse of ethnic Arabs, South Asians and other marginalized communities stemming from anti-muslim sentiments.

Increasing hate crimes against muslims are also a characteristic of islamophobia. Right after 9/11 eighty separate physical abuse incidents against muslims were carried out in Netherlands, a bomb was placed in a muslim primary school; and a right-wing youth set fire to a mosque.
In England, mosques were defaced, women and taxi drivers were increasingly abused physically and anti-muslim epithets were shouted across to them. France and Spain are also guilty of vandalization and increased violence against Muslims, which includes murder of muslim citizens.

There’s been an increase in the number of political parties that openly condemn Islam and gain popular vote hence.

The dynamics of islamophobia also stem from the translational formation of European Union and erosion of boundaries. This along with pressures from increasing immigrant populations has led to a redefinition of nationalism. This is seen as the Forza Nutva, a political party in Italy wanted it to be recognized as essentially a catholic state, which naturally means that muslims cannot be good citizens. In Spain, while the socialist party contends to integrate marginalized communities, the centre right popular party condemned this problem as a problem of immigrants and not that of the state. The anti-immigrant tendencies that have been present in these states as shifted more to islamophobia as masses are exposed to images of the stereotypical radical Islamic terrorist. For example, the Bradford riots in England could have been classified as racist, but the British National party instead classified it as a natural reaction to international terrorism. Le Pen and the National Front in France have played up on the already present fears of anti-muslim sentiments and have gained power. Italian and German political parties have used similar propaganda to gain popular vote. So much so that former prime minister Margaret Thatcher quoted that all muslims were responsible for terrorism. Italy’s Silvio Berlusconi has made many claims that the Western Civilization was far superior to Islam. In Spain former president of the Catalan Autonomous Government was quoted saying, that it was easier to integrate the Polish, Italian and French populations but not the Arab populations, even the moderate ones. Netherlands however brought about the most drastic political changes, by incorporating extreme ideas such as forbidding of Islam, deportation of second generation Moroccans, and the ban of gender segregated mosques.

Increasingly some politicians such as Nicholas Sarkozy have started using terms such as “good” and “bad” islam. The fact the muslims have to prove that they are good law abiding citizens shows the underlying assumption that they are viewed as troublemakers.

Skewed representation by the media and anti-islam literature have compounded the racist problems faced by muslims.

The media has been sending out subtle images of that are clearly islamophobic. Sensationalist news are now seen in all channels about international terrorism, and in covering such events, the media groups together all kinds of Islamic forces together, and subsumes them under one major radical Islam population. The media increasingly mixes the “Islamic religion” and the “muslim world” portraying muslims as largely homogeneous and monolithic, and inherently bad because of being a muslim; often raising questions of the largely negative ideas that stereotype islam such as status of women’s rights, rising fundamentalism and some cultural practices that the West finds offensive.

The media thus portrays a pretty skewed picture of muslim life in all the different countries. Usually sensational stories cover honourable sacrifices, forced marriages of women, etc and never anything in positive light. The media thus adopts public attitudes and prejudices instead of being informative portraying Islam and muslims as potential threats to the society.

Many intellectuals have also contributed to this growing oppression of muslim populations all over the world. Oriana Follaci’s “The Rage and the Pride” attacks muslims as being part of a terror-religion bent on destroying the Catholicism in Italy. The book sold 1.5 million copies. Many professors share the opinion that Islam is a terror religion and some of them oppose muslim immigration as it would bring in these terrorist fractions into the West. In Netherlands, the prominent philosophy professor Herman Philipse has openly claimed that Islam is a violent tribal culture that is incompatible with modern day life.

There is increased oppression of muslims when it comes to openly practicing their religion in public.

Many western countries have claimed to have adjusted to allow muslims to practise their religion. But this has been done mainly within the legal and social frameworks of Chrisitianity. Attempts to build mosques always have local resistance. The practice of religious instruction in public schools has presented problems to muslims, especially in the context of the blame Islam faces for international terrorism. In 1998, in Sttutgart, Baden- Wuettermburg, Germany, a school refused to hire a public school teacher because she wore a veil. In 2003, seven German states followed suit to ban the wearing of head scarf in schools. With respect to ongoing religious education in school, muslims have always been at a loss. Accustomed to the organization of the European Christian churches, their voices are not heard for lack of an official hierarchal clergy.

Thus in this increasingly islamophobic scenario, many institutions try to fight against discrimination of muslims. Muslims have tried to strengthen their own organizations to keep account of separate events and discriminatory policies. In Germany there has been no dialogue whatsoever for the protection of Muslims. The Deutsches Islamforum is a Muslim organization that battles anti-muslim tendencies in the society. Spain and Netherlands have various organizations trying to fight the dual evils of xenophobia and racism. There has been some community efforts in the UK to battle islamophobia. For example the campaign of the Southwark police and the muslim community with slogans such as “Islamophobia – Don’t suffer in silence” gives hope to some Muslims living in the country. There still is however a huge ocean to cross, to reach out to suffering Muslims in various marginalized communities across the world.

Reference: SECURITIZATION AND RELIGIOUS DIVIDES IN EUROPE

Muslims In Western Europe After 9/11: Why the term Islamophobia is more a predicament than an explanation by Jocelyne Cesari, GSRL-Paris and Harvard University Submission to the Changing Landscape of Citizenship and Security 6th PCRD of European Commission

Nested within love

2008-06-10T04:58:00.004+05:00

They say love makes the world go around. And they say love can move mountains. Love, the energy of which is supposed to have caused miracles, is the garden where my heart nests.

This garden, with all its fruit and poison, was definitely not created overnight. It was a garden that I was born out of, and into - as my parents' love guided the path to my conception. They planted me; supported me and nourished me; as I grew like a sapling sucking up all the love that surrounded me abundantly.

Drawing out of love, growing in love; I was but made of love. When I grew into an adolescent tree, I searched around with all my naivete, to share this love. I wanted to feel my heart and embrace my existence. Through the school years, I fondly gave plenty of it to my best friend who grew closer to me day by day. It seemed to me, that life could have been complicated; that it does bring with it its roller coasters, but with my heart so securely buckled to the love of my friend; there's no gale or thunderstorm that could as much as hurt a branch. I yearned for acceptance when I tried to kiss and embrace my fellow-tree. It seemed odd to me at that point in life that anyone could be resistant to the warmth of love or the denseness of it. Experience speaks otherwise as we grow. I'm not saying my love was not accepted. It was accepted as long as it lasted. But it never asked for more, nor gave me more. The transaction felt incomplete.

I learned slowly that love abides by its own rules. When we try to understand lovers, we must understand these rules. Often I think of love as the energy that helps one swim across the lake of relationships. When love is left incomplete, when this energy runs out in between, one has no choice but to sink. And my heart did sink.

As my heart sank more and more, I lost more of my innocence; and I stopped believing in love. For three years I tried to resurrect my heart. It remembered the love, and the addiction kept it propelled. And one day; sure enough; it swam itself into another pond of love - the growing tree that I was, had found another lover- tree.

This new found fellow mate captured me. It undid the walls of thorn that surrounded my heart slowly. I was falling in love and the thorns were being picked away. It felt fresh and new; wholesome and nourishing; as waves of love gushed into my heart. My lover ensured that my heart grew out of the love and healed its wounds. My poor little heart was becoming addicted to this newly discovered elixir that it was so eagerly drinking out of. And the more it grew, the more it radiated its love. It gave back willingly and heavily, in complete belief that this was the undying source of love. It found its new nest and settled in as a little fledgling would - naked, revealed and powerless. Little did it know of what was to come.

Soon enough my lover decided to share the elixir with another heart that might have wandered in - only this time the surrounding garden openly encouraged and nourished this new relationship. My little heart was so tucked away under blankets of secrecy and stigma. It was refused any other source of nourishment; except this one pond of love. It grew stifled, full, heavy and desperate. It wanted to re-build the walls of protection; but too late - the love had done its damage. It grew heavier and heavier till the whole system was close to collapsing. My lover was confused. My mate tree had assumed it was whole enough to cover two fledgling hearts, that there was enough place for two; but in the process one of the hearts had to pay heavily and unfortunately it was mine.

My heart finally fled the pond of love, I grew outwards leaving the familiar patches and into newer sunshine. I shunned the addiction and the pain. I tried to heal.

But like all tragic love transactions, this one was left incomplete too; only my heart had fallen deeper and the wounds are fresher. It lost a lot in this feud as it tried its best not to sink; as soon as the love-energy propeller decided to rust. It fled and it swam; and paid heavily. The addiction was too strong, and my heart still yearns for the pond of love and my lover.

Strangely enough; the pond of love seemed to miss this tiny fledgling heart too. My lover-tree had often embraced the love of this poor heart. It is hard for me to judge the feelings of my lover-tree; but sure enough part of it wilted in the feud.

Love, my heart learned, is experience. It is holy and divine; but its power is beyond moving mountains or making the world go around. I now grow in a not-so loving environment as I once did; away from the familiar patches. But I grow slowly and heal my heart steadily. There are times I wonder if I was really meant to be with the pond of love I wandered into; and to date I've never found an answer. Both me and my lover wilted through the years; growing out of other pieces of nourishment, but to me it is clear that as long as this transaction remains incomplete, I must but fight to stay afloat.

2008-05-18T23:45:00.005+05:00

"When you encounter another person, when you have dealings with anyone at all, it is as if a question is being put to you. So you must think, What is the Lord asking of me in this moment, in this situation? If you confront insult or antagonism, your first response will be to respond in kind. But if you think, as it were, This is an emissary sent from Lord, and some benefit is intended for me, first of all to demonstrate my faithfulness, the chance to show that I do in some small degree participate in the grace that saved me, you are free to act otherwise than as circumstances would seem to dictate. You are free to act by your own lights. You are freed at the same time of the impulse to hate or resent that person. He would probably laugh at the thought that the Lord sent him to you for your benefit (and his), but that is the perfection of disguise, his own ignorance of it."

"It seems almost a cruelty for one generation to beget another when parents can secure so little for their children, so little safety, even in the best circumstances. Great faith is required to give the child up, trusting God to honor the parents' love for him by assuring that there will indeed be angels in that wilderness"

Marilynne Robinson in Gilead

2008-05-10T10:00:00.005+05:00

Feeling the life inside.

Life is a funny thing. It's funny because it is in a way simple to understand but complex to define. I've never been able to answer what life is, from a biological viewpoint, and yet we all know it when we talk about it; as if it does not need definition, as if defining it is plain unnecessary.

I sometimes dream of how my life came into being. How did it feel being my father's sperm and my mother's oocyte? Did I know it was me when that fateful fertilization event took place or did I wander in giving life to the zygote that grew in my mother's womb?

I remember random events through my childhood. I remember feeling life when I was happy, when I was loved, when I felt close to my parents, when I felt sad, and when I was in pain.
It's so ironic that looking back, it was pain that brought life closest to me. And I don't regret it, for it's beautiful in its own unique way; as if following a special code of the universe.

Around 3 years back, began what I now perceive as an ordeal for me in order to feel life. It was a period where intense emotions were swallowing me, and I almost felt as if I were in a whirlpool of thoughts and feelings. It felt hard, it felt hopeless; and I felt lifeless. I felt as if I'd lost to some super power taking over me. I perceived my heart to be shut down, but that did not make sense; for I still felt things; and these very feelings were driving me mad.

I'd feel love and anger; sadness and jealousy all at the same time. My body rattled through all these different moods, trying its best to process them one by one. And I wonder now, if these different emotions were my own creation or was it something that I was wandering into; the fateful whirlpool that was waiting; ready to swallow me?

It's hard for me now to remember how I reacted at the physiological level; for that was unfortunately what was least important to me then. I'm sure my heart fluttered multiple times, it constantly reminded me of its presence by pumping blood in a strained manner, as if it was pushing out against a strong up-current. I remember blood - the dull red flavor of which gave me unique satisfaction, but most of all I remember my breathing.

Breathing then was so hard . It was painful, obviously; and unfair that it was expected of me to breathe; when I was drowning - in the fateful whirlpool which was sucking out life-giving air, and which was filled with emotions, thoughts and nightmares. And as I tried to breathe through it all, my mind would loose itself in anger; my heart in sadness and my body would simply shun love and all things good. It turned into an obsession - a painful addiction; and at some point I just decided that all this was so beautiful that I must not start breathing. I think I was scared to loose it all - and I'm still unsure what "all" stands for -maybe the emotions? maybe the intensity? or maybe I simply decided that I wasn't living enough if this weren't part of me and part of my life.

And now when I look back; on my re-birth after this experience, I feel life. I feel life seeping into me - or maybe I'm wrong. I think what is seeping in is not life; but this new sense organ - that feels life for me. In either case, I'm unravelling my life from within. It definitely is a calm after the storm; and it feels good. But what is most satisfying and peaceful, is the life from within. I am growing closer to myself, I am able to feel myself; I am letting out my life, and I feel it more and more each day; each minute. The state of lifelessness had created such a powerful vacuum, that as the life is sucked in I am able to sense it.

Indeed, I am lucky to have gone through all the pain; just to feel my life; as it blooms and takes over me again.

2008-04-13T00:10:00.007+05:00

Dominant Mistresses.
My deepest sexual fantasy has always been with people who break gender rules. No, I'm not talking about bisexuality, but more subtle than that - the "trans" factor. Bisexuality counts too, I guess. I deeply fantasize top women, and dominant mistresses. I think if I was ever to try S&M, it would be with a top woman, maybe FTM?.

I believe that the one who hurts you most, can give you most pleasure. And I'm not into porn at all. Pornography disgusts me. It's so bi-gendered - even if it was gay porn. People don't break gender rules. There's always a "top" - a penetrator and a "bottom" - a receiver. I want more than that - porn does not offer that, it doesn't turn me on.
People who transgress turn me on. Men who dress like women, women who dress like men. Women with strap ons, women who penetrate, men who receive.
They turn me on.
in fact, what is man and woman? I dream beyond men and women.
I dream of androgeneity.
I dream of the middlesex.
I dream of transgender.

2008-03-30T23:19:00.006+05:00

Cyber-racism.

The concept of racism is nothing new to this world. It's been a part of human civilization ever since the evolution of culture. It has, however, never become more relevant to our daily lives than in the present. With strides in technology, people find themselves living with other people from different ethnic and racial backgrounds, they find themselves interacting with other cultures, and forming judgments based on skin color, behavior, speech and habit. People living in minority groups are increasingly finding it stressful to deal with mainstream authority and oppression, more so with races that have classically held power and privilege.

The USA is an interesting country in that it is a country essentially based on an amalgam of different immigrants. This immigration process started right from the time when Columbus landed. The white Europeans evicted the native Americans from there lands and subjugated them to torture and slavery. The native Americans themselves were a diverse group of peoples scattered across the land. This set the dice rolling with more European colonists coming in to fight for their piece of pie. In the ages of imperialism, Africans were brought in numerous hordes into the continent. Africans from different cultures, from an entire continent, each African representing a different tribe. After this slavery-tide, came waves of immigration during the world wars; with large numbers of Europeans fleeing the war in Europe. And finally, post-second world war saw the rise in immigration of Asians - Chinese, Indians, Koreans, Japanese into the mainland.

So the question of race becomes very important to the people of United States. In spite of this amalgam of peoples living in this country, all the positions of privilege were classically held by the whites - seen by the absence of a single president who was also a person of color, until maybe probably now; among other things.

The US however has shrugged off a lot of its duties in dealing with racism - both systemic and personal. This came to light in the recent UN conference on racism in Geneva. The international community has recognized racism as a necessary evil and has very strict laws in dealing with it. For example, in Germany, there are laws that ban the existence of the extreme-pro-Aryan neo-Nazi party. This should however not be interpreted as absence of racism in these countries.
In spite of international pressure , the US has grappled with policies on racism and sadly, many racists in this country are in fact supported by law. The first crucial amendment to the US constitution which guarantees freedom of speech and expression has often been misused, abused and taken advantage of, in the States, when people propagate hate crimes, hate speeches, and set-up websites of white supremacy. It is sad, that the US government does not see that freedom always comes with duties - duties to human values. In fact philosophers have time and again pointed out that there is no such thing as absolute freedom. While hate speeches are widely illegal across the world, it's so common in the States, that if one searches for white supremacy on google, a number of websites show up - websites filled with racist hate speeches, anti-semitist feelings and homophobia.
One such website is www.stormfront.org, bringing me to the topic of cyber-racism.
It is the first of the 2000 and odd websites that are now available and propagate white supremacy, anti-semitism, and neo-nazism. In many countries these sites would have been censored and the creator of such websites would have been persecuted - more evidence of the ambiguous stand of the US government on race. In fact the US is now a safe haven for the new generation of cyber-racists.
It comes as a shock to many people across the world - almost like a loophole in spite of all the international laws against racism. Five years ago there was just one such website propagating white supremacy. Now there are over a thousand sites, easily accessible by public. Even more shocking is that some of these websites target kids. The members of these websites recruit new members from chat-rooms, which are now increasingly filled with naive and vulnerable youth. It is indeed a pity that creators of these websites can walk free without facing any legal consequences.
The world and the international community are now alarmed at the rise of such websites. For not only is the world wide web internationally accessible, the white supremists now have a way of propagating hate across the world. As feared, this is exactly what is happening. Blocking is of course an option, but a lot of good websites end up getting blocked too. Not only this, cyber-racists can easily set up their own servers or move on to other servers.
The internationaly community, after experiencing US reluctance in dealing with racism, has come up with certain measures that might be passed into practice very soon.
1. If internet companies publish racist material, their directors should be liable for criminal charges on trips abroad, where they could even be arrested.
2. If racism cannot be legally proved, it maybe easier to get a conviction on grounds of discrimination
3. Another legal route to cracking down on internet racism may be to confiscate the copyright of a racist work put onto a US server from abroad. Armed with the copyright, that government could then force any US provider to remove the offensive material from the site.

Hopefully, if US citizens do elect a black president, there would probably be better handling of policies concerning racism. For not only is this a country's problem , but a problem of the world - spread through cyberspace, and targeting the most vulnerable population - the youth.These measures therefore have to be implemented soon, to prevent racists from winning this war through cyberspace.

2008-03-23T03:09:00.005+05:00

89 000 and counting

It's been five years since the war officially started in Iraq. Blogs of Iraqi survivors are now the focus of the international community. In one of these blogs, a 14 year old girl describes how she had celebrated Id . She describes how much it meant to her to be with her family, and how happy she was that there were no bomb blasts in her town and no one, at least in her family died that day.
Another 16 year old writes about how her father was forcibly evacuated from her house in Baghdad, knocked unconscious, tied and gagged. She writes about how she learned of her father's death, who had been shot in the head that night. And how much her life has changed ever since.
Such is a plight of a war-torn country. And as history has reminded us time and again, the worst sufferers of a war such as this, are the civilians.
Other bloggers describe how they have been displaced from their homes, how they've lost all that they'd possessed, except their lives, and how most unfortunately, they've all lost someone who had been a part of them - husbands, and wives, children and fathers, mothers and sisters - all as victims to the war.
The international communtiy now places the toll of iraqi civilian deaths since the war started to be 89 000. 89 000 lives were killed over the last five years. These deaths have affected families who find it hard to cling on to hope and faith. A far greater number of Iraqis have fled the country. The international community and UNHCR have placed an estimate 2.5 million refugees now living in Syria and Jordan. These numbers are harmless on paper, but each one of them is a life that has been forcibly evacuated or has fled out of fear from home. Furthermore, the number of asylum seekers has increased and rough estimates range anywhere from 25000 to 30000.

Such is the extent of civilian damage due to the war.

The war itself was started by the US government five years ago under the presidency of George W Bush, a time in which Iraq was suspected of possessing weapons of mass destruction. President Bush justified the cause of the war then by iterating his three goals of the war - to destroy the weapons of mass destruction, deport Saddam Hussein ending his dictatorship and establish a stable democracy in Iraq. This is one of the instants in history where a superpower in this world assumes the privilege of making radical changes in a society that is far removed from its own - the concept of western "civilization" reaching out to other "less developed nations" . Even after five years of brutal fighting, only one of the three goals has been achieved - the deport of Saddam Hussein. The first goal of destroying weapons of mass destruction can only be achieved if any of those weapons existed. On the other hand, the establishment of a stable democracy has been indefinitely postpond.
In spite of this, President Bush is convinced that the war happened for good. He talked about the "success" the US army had in deporting an Iraqi dictator in a recent speech that he gave to commemorate the fifth anniversary of the iraqi war. There was no mention , however, of how weapons of mass destruction have never been found, and how a stable democracy is still a dream to the Iraqi people.
On another note, US Vice president Cheney, this Monday, made a trip to Baghdad and praised the improvement in security situations in Iraq. The same day 60 civilians were killed in a bomb blast. Also to be noted is that this statement came from a man who traveled with a pack of well armed body guards and had not left the "green zone" of high security while he was in Iraq.

The war itself is now at a stale-mate. Back in the States, Bush's presidential term comes to an end. As US presidential-hopefuls fight for the presidency, they voice their opinions on the issue of Iraq. John Mc Cain the chosen republican candidate strongly supports the war, as he always had had. He believes the troops have to stay in Iraq to ensure the establishment of democracy in Iraq. Obama and Clinton both oppose the war, with each proposing plans on how the troops ought to be withdrawn. Either way, there is no convincing solution. The damage is done. A lot remains to be done in terms of establishing a democracy as well as improving security measures. If the US withdraws its troops, would it be helpful to a country that is already very unstable politically and lacks the intelligence of the US troops? On the other hand, how long can US interfere in something that is not its business?
Indeed, Bismarck in the 19th century had wisely observed that democracy can never be "brought" to a country. This had been clear to him after an attempt by the French revolutionaries to bring democracy to Germany failed. Had he been alive now, he would have felt something more than deja vu.
Thus the saga of US superiority continues in this world. Its foreign policies have always been controversial, be it its role in Central America or in Vietnam. As the international community watches on, the Iraq war continues. There is no convincing solution at hand as changes in government take place in the US. Globally the war has been condemned, but little has been done about it. As many countries do take a stand in the war, they fail to voice the double standards the US government resorts to, to justify anything that it does, be it as destructive as a war. There is a lesson to be learned as the war goes down in history, and as we still stand at 89 000 and counting.

2007-03-05T08:12:00.001+05:00

The world can't get enough of Madonna, and with CD/DVD sets like The Confessions Tour dropping regularly, it's little wonder why. As a thrower of fantasy dance parties, she is peerless. As a physical role model for the 40-ish women who grew up on her music, she rules. And as an arbiter of what's going to sound shockingly original in any given decade--well, duh. The Confessions Tour rounds up songs from way back--"Ray of Light" and "La Isla Bonita" make the DVD, and "Lucky Star" and "Like a Virgin" are on the CD as well as the DVD--but this concert, filmed in 2006 at London's Wembley Arena, aims its sturdiest spotlight on Confessions on a Dance Floor, Madge's 2005 disco disc. You could argue, then, that unless you're in it for the sheer DVD spectacle (and what a spectacle it is), there's no sense in owning this package. Only you wouldn't be right. Because as any on-the-ball Madonna fan knows, what she's doing musically is telling a story--you may already know the characters, but that doesn't mean she hasn't completely reworked the plot. To that end, "I Love New York" gets its rock on, "Let It Will Be" has a musical temper tantrum, and "Hung Up" goes for the drama queen award. You've heard these songs before, but you've never heard them quite like this, to borrow a bad informercial phrase. As twisted and hopped-up as they've become, they're all worth getting to know again.

2007-02-01T03:34:00.000+05:00

Cornell.....

Well, being in Cornell for over a semester is time enough to realize that this school, (presumably unlike most other schools), is a sanctuary of the most random and crazy people....To elucidate,

1. It's -20 F. I am freezing my ass out in spite of the down jacket, the double layered thermal wear, jeans, T shirt, sweater and wollen socks, gloves and a wollen cap. I shiver and tremble as I keep step after step on feet deep snow and walk grudgingly towards the bus stand....And through the misty night, I squint my eyes as I hear some noise...more like horses trotting...I squinted more, and suddenly the most random guys with a short and a sweat, run past me in jogging shoes on the snow....I mean, where they on their way to stupid town? Or perhaps jogging in the snow makes you more athletic?

2. Caleb: I am alcoholic
Me: really?
Caleb: I drink almost everyday
Me: that doesnt make you alcoholic
Caleb: I woke up with a pot-smoke covered face and random alcohol bottles in the toilet last saturday
Me:hmm
Caleb: Gawd! Dont you understand? I had my liver checked ...It's completely dysfunctional

3. Jay: I just shocked the shit out of my labmates
Me: What did u do?
Jay: I told them about my fuckbuddy
Me: What??!! LOL...I could have done that too
Jay: well there was an awkward silence that followed
Me:what did u do then?
Jay: I told them : "my fuckbuddy is hot!"
Me: LOL, if you had made the scene more awkward, I owe you a dollar..
Jay: I did
Me: ha ha...dont kid me
Jay: I told them: "He has got a huge dick!"
(Awkward silence ensues....)
Me: Ok...I owe you a dollar....

4.Crazy guy with a pony and smoking , and body piercings all over on ho plaza: " Hey there!"
Me: uh? Hallo
Crazy guy: I just wanted to tell you, your eyes are beautiful are you indian?
Me (awkwardly): well, ...yeah
Crazy guy: OH MY GOD..I love the mascara...you got to tell me how you wear it...
Me: ...Look, firstly I dont fancy being stopped in the shitty cold
Secondly, I am not a metro
thirdly, I DO NOT wear mascara....

5. My cell bio professor on his lecture on actin,

"Actin has multiple functions. It's found on the cell cortex..blah..blah..blah...It is even released by the acrosome in the sperm during fertilization. So when the sperm encounters the egg, its acrosome disintegrates releasing various enzymes...ah look at that picture, there...you see actin forming, the egg wall being penetrated, and isn't it lovely, that is exactly how the sperm screws the egg...."

5. My friend Jason,
"Oh i love the application of physics to life...Today we did electrostatics, and isnt it amazing, how so much of it can be applied to day to day life?"
Me: yeah yeah
Jason: no seriously, Like imagine,,,guys to be protons, and we are all in the gym, then what do you do in the shower? You try to get away as far away as possible from the pther guys...Like protons repelling
Me:Dude, you just dont wanna be with nude guys...it's awkward
Jason: Exactly, protons are like nude guys...

6. And lastly, some of its craziness rubbed on me too...
I was completely drunk once in a club,
and ..

Me (to random girl): Hi
Girl: Hey there!
Me: you loook reallly keyoote...Are youi from here?
girl: Why, thank you! Yes i go to cornell..
Me:Can I fertilize your eggs later tonight?

2006-12-15T04:32:00.000+05:00

New York City

Have you ever woken up at 4 am, taken a subway to one freaky neighbourhood, walked down to Times Square, into a bar, danced your way back home the next morning?...Well, all the above is possible in perhaps only one city in this world...New York. Ok, it's one thing to actually be living there and get stressed due to the traffic and pollution, and another to make frequent weekend getaways to the big Apple. I chose the latter :)

New York, has always fascinated me and the first thing I EVER wanted to do in the US was visit NYC. I still remember peeping out of the window as the friendly driver was trying to strike meaningful conversation with me and being awed by the first skyline of NYC with the missing twin towers. Oh, and from that time, till I boarded the bus again, I swear my pulse was a degree higher than what it normally should have been..

It is one city where you walk down China town, into Little Italy, order exotic stuff in restaurants, hear scary stories about dark alleys and run into people selling coke. Well, the first time on my subway, I encountered a super-serious fight between a black guy and a white man, and I (ironically) smiled, at what people have told me about NYC and I whispered to my scared Chinese friend,. :It's New york dude..

We went on, did a little bit of shopping in Macy's and we got down on Broadway. That was where I remember Ina spotting a bright glow at the end of the road, and she was like, There's something there, let's go..And so we went, walked a good ten blocks to witness live cameras, bright billboards, limos, tourists and open shops in the famed Times Square. OMG, I was so in awe and I felt the place I came from was a literal village in comparison. I walked on to see bright billboards of Yahoo and Hershey's and Virgin Records, A topless girl posed in the middle of times square asking for charity money, and people rushed around me, pushed me and shouted names. Life on earth is not in the rainforests, but right here in Times Square,..all this at 10 pm..We went into the Hard Rock Cafe, and other bars around. Bar hopping in NYC is so much fun, especially if you got one at the end of every street.

Sunday, we guys decided to go to a broadway show, I was so confused which musical to pick and settled down for Disney's Beauty and the Beast. The line was a 2 hour wait, and the ticket a good 70 dollars before I actually settled down to see the show. The show was beautiful, fire crackers lit up the stage, props moved in and out, actors and actresses danced their ways and sang to the glory of music. I almost cried at "A tale as old as time, song as old as rhyme...", and realized what a hopeless romantic I was.

Parties, bars, clubs, violence. The nights in NY are really well known for the above. You can get shot in the head, robbed of money, mugged, or end as a prostitute. Ok the last one was just a little over dramatic, but NY is true hardcore. My friend tells me, "You cannot be a pussy and live in NYC, it just doesnt isnt Texas."

Central park can be haven to most drug dealers too, but all I witnessed was a hip-hop style, black dancing right in the middle of the park.

Well, NYC still has me gasping, and I plan on going there almost once a month...It is more than just the big apple...:)

2006-09-20T08:08:00.000+05:00

I remember that the choice was mine,
completely.

It was a life without days and nights,
crazy as one could be.

The lights are gone now,
The splendour worn out.

I lost the battle,
in the feud of when and how.

My heart beats slower, my chest pounds faster
the pain cuts in, sometimes unnoticed.

De-sensitized and fierce, I fight on,
In pursuit of hope and a new dawn.

Do you remember when I was very young?
How I shone, how I played?

I wonder if I have a choice yet,
And I wish to choose time.

2006-08-11T23:10:00.000+05:00

The night was deep, darkness unfolded itself,
A lonely dog wailed and I tried to console myself.
I closed my eyes and a drop of tear rolled down.
The pain was excruciating, and my face turned into a frown.
I tried to swallow the sorrow and the grief;
it was then I heard the voice of an angel brief.
I opened my eyes, to glare into the thick black blanket,
The vision gloomy, my eyes glistened wet.
I heard it call my name, again and again.
I prayed so hard, but in vain.
It beckoned me to heaven, away from this world
That had given me misery and sadness untold.
It promised me no pain and infinite softness
And above all the pleasure of ultimate hapiness.
It asked me how long I should fight this war
That I am sure to loose, my mouth turned sour.
Why I have to push through this battle internal
and why I try to evade the mighty Lord's call
And I closed my eyes and prayed for just one more chance
so that I have the strength to wrestle myself out of this trance
And it replied that it had heard it all before
That I cannot take this unjust and grief anymore.
I felt my heart loosing hope and whispered sorry
The angel vanished and my name echoed faintly.

2006-07-23T16:42:00.000+05:00

pink

The colour pink, a blend of red and white, or sometimes called lighter red, was "invented" in the 17th century. The word was derived from the flowers of the plant pink, which had light red coloured flowers. Surprisingly pink through the ages, till about the twentieth century had been considered very masculine whereas blue was considered feminine. In 1918, fashion underlined that pink, being a lighter version of red, which was a bold colour, displayed assertiveness and confidence, more masculine traits and hence was widely worn by men. Blue on the other hand was considered dainty and delicate; more feminine. Since when did pink become more feminine?
Pink was used by the Nazis to widely tag homosexuals. Infact when the Jews were forced to wear the yellow stars of David, gay men wore pink triangles and were executed by the Nazis. After the second world war, pink became more "feminine" and dainty...the first picture people associate with pink is infact a small girl with pretty pink dress or a pink flower. Blue displaced its role as a more masculine colour...and jeans, denim and other tough wear came out in blue..
In the 21 st century, fashion has often been determined by the loudness of dressing, pink, again being associated with the growing techno culture, the liberals, the environmentalists and the peace makers. It has slowly creeped back into men's fashion, and in fact personally, I think, a pink shirt once in a while , worn with black jeans, makes a guy look sexy. ;)
whatever be the symbolism, I love pink :)

2006-07-15T22:41:00.000+05:00

The Magic of Music.

Music has lifted shades of hue, penetrated souls and sometimes provided an almost meditative experience. But sometimes one is overwhelmed by music and the profound image that it leaves in one's mind is but obvious; like it did an hour ago in me. The feeling arose not due to a spiritual prayer or a meditative chant; it came unexplained propelled by the familiar beats of pop and rock.
As I tuned in to the one of the few channels that I choose to watch in the hundred odd "channelled" idiot box, I came across the live 8 concert being aired live on VH1. Having nothing at hand, I decided to spend my late evening watching the concert....and boy that was one heck of a concert.
Dedicated to HIV+ poverty stricken people all over the world, but mainly in Africa; the concert began with Bob Geldhof giving a brief introduction into what the live 8 was and how it worked. As the concert kick started; images of dying african children flashed onto the screen. People, with hardly any flesh; people for whom the ability to live itself becomes a gift, people who have no food, no nutrition whatsoever; almost fated to be born just to die. The images carried stark messages; almost piercing one's heart, and then music flowed....
Music...I heard Coldplay in the background; and on any other normal day I would have probably joined in the vocals...But today I couldn't; probably because I was already choked. Yellow resonated in my ears as did a lot of other songs by artists as widely reputed as Linkin Park, Snopp Dogg, Robbie Williams, U2, Elton John and some less well known ones. But what really moved me was a performance of Bitter Sweet Symphony The song by itself withheld amazingly soulful orchestra; and today it reverberated with the vocals:
Cos it's a bitter sweet symphony that's life
The electronic rock beats combined with orchestra spun the magic, and seemed to melt my heart as images of the children floated by.
Another performance by Annie Lennox, a solo piano-accompanied track, echoed in the background as more images flashed...this time with numbers..statistics...that every 3 seconds a child does...showing stark contrasts in the ways of our life and that of a malnourished african. It almost felt as if it was sin just to have food when one is hungry..But the message was nailed into my head..Why the heck do we not do anything about it? And it may not be just some unknown poverty stricken tribe in Africa..What about us?.What about our environment? why is it that whatever is available is always taken for granted? And most importantly why the hell are we so selfish?
Madonna came on stage too..Her usually compulsive Music seemed to be providing hidden messages...When she sang Music makes the people come together , for the first time I realized how true that line was...People in Toronto, Philadelphia, Johannesberg, Berlin, London, Paris were all listening to the live concert right then...And then it was so true...that whatever be the background, we all are infact united by the language of music; in the face of common enemies; be it poverty or a deadly disease..Her Like aPrayer literally moved me to tears when the chorus joined in
Just like a prayer
I'll take you there
It's like a dream to me..
And I imagined that it was all after all just a prayer...we all seek resort in our prayers, and extending that resort to unhappy people was a dream come true for them.

2006-07-14T11:19:00.000+05:00

MADONNA

To dwelve into the psyche of a woman, who has been at the top for more than twenty years is not going to be easy.Trust me...Especially if she happens to be someone who was worshipped by one's mother... So, it's kinda strange that I actually inherited this fan fever (Genetic buffs, it runs through the X chromosome.lol.) ...But what intrigues me most about Madonna, as a woman, is that she pushes limit. Whether it be her sexuality or motherhood; spirituality or controversy, or even touring or, what does she does best, singing :). Watching clips of her latest tour, The Confessions tour, I could feel the familiar butterflies in my stomach; and yet I feel it everytime she releases a new album, wears a new look or even does a new video. This pop star, going through cycles of reinvention has kept me guessing about her next look, her next album and the next genre of music she would encroach. That is true....one of her best assets (apart from looking like a teen-queen at the age of fifty) is this mantra of reinvention that keeps fans gasping, as they follow her fast-paced life that makes her music "cool" across two decades.
As the stage lights shimmered and a golden disco ball slowly suspended made its way down, I could hear the fans screaming...the stage lit up in a second and music flowed as if from no where..Madonna appeared on stage; holding the mike and the music reached its peak...I could barely hear her...Then the stage transformed..Dancers appeared from nowhere. Three big screens flashed behind her. She was wearing a jockey-dressed-cowgirl look. Her biceps splitt the sleeves and the familiar determined eyes stared directly into the crowd...As the music followed,
I could hear myself singing involuntarily
You're not half the man you think you are
Save your words because you've gone too far...
So what is it that kept her at the top?...She had contemporaries far better than her in vocals..Whitney Houston, Mariah Carey, etc...and her lyrics are not very poetic either....Nay folks!..It's the performer in her that keeps the concept of Madonna alive across two decades...The stage performances, the videos, the songs, the clothes....they shock people, keep fans looking at her in awe and continue to set trend....Every video, every album she's different. From the techno stringed "Ray of light" to peppy electronic "Music"..The disco-fever "Confessions on a Dance Floor" to the soulful " Like a Prayer", from the sinister-underhub "Erotica" to the R&B influenced "Bedtime Stories" , there's no genre of music left for her to discover...She's done it all..
As a friend of mine (who was not a Madonna fan) put it....I've listened to her for the past two decades...And everytime, she's good...the album, the music, the videos....I can be sure of the Madonna-material...
Well, she has come a long way from that teeny-pop idol who wanted to rule the world...:)...and through generations she continues to spread her magic in music :)

" Music makes the people come together "

2006-07-13T20:19:00.000+05:00

Goodbye to You

Last night I drove around for more than an hour,

I inadvertently had to end up at yours,

Well, I was not confused or torn or even sad

You failed in your attempt in driving me mad

I could have gone on, left you behind

Or leave you just a letter quietly signed,

But I wanted to give you that one last chance

To let you know that I am no more in a trance,

Then I saw yesterday what I’d expected,

Fairly played, you lost the chance I’d created,

I am moving on, have a life to live

Am sorry to say you’ve got nothing more to give.

You may think you’re successful, and amazing

Sorry, it takes more than cheap impressing

Clearly, you dwelled in hypocrisy all along

And now you know why I had to write this song.

You think you’re strong and can let me go

You’re like paper that one emotion can out-blow

Aphasic, and dumbstruck, you’re no more special

You’re just one among the others several

I’ve made up mind and am not staying

So see you when you’re forty, it’s not changing.

/*Some lines have been adapted from Dido, See you when you're forty*/

2006-07-13T15:27:00.000+05:00

BEEEP,....
It's funny how a man only thinks about the...
You got a real big heart, but I'm looking at your...
You got real big brains, but I'm looking at your...
Girl, there ain't no pain in me looking at your... ...

ha ha....That folks is no pick up line from my side. Well, if you haven't heard of the Pussy cat dolls; then you must be a real big dork.Coz they're there...hapenning, fashionable, hep and SLUTTY..lol.
So, what's so new about this? Nothing, Marilyn Monroe did it long ago, and so did Madonna in her sinister album Erotica. Let's face it folks. Being slutty is totally in.
I tune into the radio, and there I hear Rihanna purring SOS. Must have stood for showing off skin...and I switch on the TV and what do I see?..OMG..That's Nelly Furtado being a "maneater" in her new video. Christina stripped in her last album..literally ;); so much so that she's now called Xtina. And boy do I need to mention that Moulin Rouge soundtrack?
They're all there...looking primarily slutty, bearing every piece of skin that's there on their bodies, looking so thin that I wonder how the heck could there possibly be a food shortage in this earth, and having done all that Make up...
The act of being a pop star is essentially incomplete without the slutty look. Well, Madonna showed more than just skin in the album Erotica and the book that followed Sex...So much so that kids were advised not to watch MTV for at least 6 months. The "Justify my Love" video was infact banned from MTV... Britney Spears could be seen baring it all in all her new videos...Toxic, I'm a Slave for you, etc. And the million dollar thingie about what she did to her b**bs. Hint: Pam is an old friend of hers lol.
So let's face it folks..they're making money, they're being slutty and frankly I really don't mind maneaters in my living room...*Ouch*

I don't give a... Keep looking at my...
'Cause it don't mean a thang if you're looking at my...
I'm a do my thing while you're playing with your...

2006-07-13T13:38:00.000+05:00

The sky turns cloudy and oh it's so dark,
My mind whirls around in thoughts of you so stark.
There seems to be no end to my happiness
As I think of your return and all of our craziness...
The drops trickle down one by one,
Breaking through the shining rays of the dim sun.
And my lips turn into a smile as at the distance u stand
Your eyes open wide, and your hair let down so grand..
A streak of lightning brightens the sky.
Giving a glimpse of your let down head, held so shy.
The dark clouds burst out in the perfect horizon
As in their shade, it is our love I envision.
And then as we come closer and under the clouds unite,
The rain falls over us assuming greater might.
And as I relished , I was soaked in your love.
The cherished memories of that day with the rain above.
And as the sun came out in all its glory.
The fresh landscape lit up in the rays, so lovely.
And I felt that nothing in this world would bring us apart.
As in our journeys we embark, you in my heart.

2006-07-13T13:22:00.000+05:00

http://www.karelia.ru/Karelia/Exhibit/nature/pic/noorun.jpg

This poem I wrote to my mother who taught me how to pray :) . Some of the lines were adapted from Mariah Carey's My Saving Grace. The lines could not have been more apt.

I've loved a lot,
been hurt a lot.
And spent precious years
just wrapped up in fear
With no end in sight
Until my saving grace shined her light,
She shined her light just on me
She is truly and undoubtedly the Power that be..

And I've been bruised
I grew up so confused
Been destitute
Soaked in solitude
Been stigmatized
and Black and white
felt so sad inside
Until my saving grace took me for a ride,
And that ride was just for me
She is truly the Power that be...

She gave me peace
She gave me strength,
She gave me hope
and she gave me faith
When i had almost lost it all
And she was there whenever I called

And the bountiful things that You do,
Oh Lord, Thank You
For delivering me
my saving grace
And i still exist because
She's there for me till the last..

2006-07-13T13:15:00.000+05:00

The time has come, we have to part...
It flew so fast, i thought we would last
As best friends we lived together
And withheld promises to be kept forever..
Inside I was just a child, that's covered by innocence.
And you took care of me in moments so tense.
With you I learned to break all the illusion.
To keep up with all this hate and worldly deception
And I know that I'll remember, forever,
the way that you changed me..
And gave me the strength to see
All this damned shit and cruelty.
And as I bid this last goodbye
A tear drop or two falls by,
And in my heavy heart I hold
The cherished memories of joy untold.